What?

The license plate on this car reads "SNAAB." I imagine it's supposed to be cute because it's on a Saab. There are a couple of things wrong with this:

For starters, the car is dirty. A true snob would never drive around in something so filthy.

Secondly, Saab is originally a Swedish product but is now wholly-owned by General Motors. Yes, General Motors. The same company that used to make the Chevrolet Cavalier. There is nothing high-class about that.

Lastly, Saabs have traditionally represented a less pretentious approach to style and quality engineering. Having a Saab owner imply that they are a snob is like wearing a full-length fur coat furnished of man-made materials or carrying a fake Louis Vuitton purse. It just doesn't make sense.

Hat Attack

I found this exquisite example of a man roaming around the Target in downtown Minneapolis. He is wearing a coyote on his head. A fucking coyote. Why isn't someone from PETA following him around dousing him with red paint?

Ablutophobia

Oh no! I think I have discovered another condition my roommate may be suffering from - ablutophobia: the fear of cleaning.

Papyrophobia

I am convinced my roommate suffers from papyrophobia: a fear of paper products. He will use all of the toilet tissue on the roll, then begin to use a new roll and leave it somewhere other than on the toilet paper holder. Also, he will allow his mail to pile atop the kitchen island for as long as I allow it. I usually just clear it off every two weeks. He will even let checks that I write him sit on the counter for days before he will take and deposit them. Unbelievable.

I hear you coming.

I don't think there is anything funny about being blind. However, I came across a site called Porn for the Blind and found it to be hilarious. Check it out.

Mr. and Mrs. President

This is Rupaul portraying Mr. and Mrs. Obama. I love it! I bet Tyra Banks is pulling her wig off in anger for not thinking of this first. God bless America.

Midtown Exchange Apartments

Here is a review I wrote for the Midtown Exchange Apartments in Minneapolis, MN. Now that I have started to search for apartments in Miami, I really appreciate finding blog postings about how other people feel about their buildings.

I have lived in the Midtown Exchange Apartments for almost eighteen months. The building has its pros and cons (like any other).

I work and play in both the downtown and Uptown areas of Minneapolis. Being that there is a Metro Transit station located on site, public transport is quite convenient.

I also appreciate the covered parking with the underground walkway. However, don't expect to "run out to the car quick." It takes at least seven minutes to get from the apartment to the garage and back.

Having the Global Market downstairs is more than a convenience; it's a treat.

Because the building offers units at market rates as well as reduced rates for individuals with lower incomes, there is a mixed crowd. I feel that there are a number of people in the building who do not take pride in the place they call home. Fortunately, the janitorial and security staff member are good at their jobs.

The security staff is friendly and present 24/7. They do a very good job of monitoring the perimeter of the building (as well as the parking garage). There are also security cameras throughout that are monitored continuously.

I think the biggest downside to living in the Midtown Exchange Apartments is the management. My rent is never processed promptly (despite being dropped off before the 5th of the month), and I regularly receive notices stating that my rent is past due. Whenever I do bother to call the management office, I am advised to not "worry about it." Also, the management office keeps extremely inconvenient hours, and they generally aren't around when they should be, or they leave "out of office" notes frequently. Throughout the time I have lived here, I have left several messages which were never returned. The management staff also seems incapable of dispatching maintenance in a timely fashion.

Overall, I think this apartment building is a tremendous value. I don't think people should be deterred by the location. I would recommend my building to friends.

Call In Gay

So, today is Day Without A Gay day - say that ten times fast. I'm gay, so I guess I can't go to work. It's really a shame. Today would have been my first day working with new software that still has a million bugs to workout. Also, I would be working with someone who isn't proficient with the new software either. I'm not interested in throwing myself into the lion's den.

I digress.

Apparently, me "calling in gay" this morning is supposed to represent an effort to show the size and impact of the gay and lesbian community. This showing is in response to the Vatican's opposition to a proposed United Nations resolution calling for the global decriminalization of homosexuality. Not cool.

I'm supposed to use the day off to volunteer at an event in my area to help raise awareness about the cause. Instead, I think I will spend the morning doing pilates and looking for a new job.

Cheese

I know it's tacky to take a picture of a picture, so I guess I'm tacky. Please don't think that I find myself particularly appealing in this photograph. It just makes me smile (and not like the smile in the photograph). "What smile?" you ask. Well, in my mind I was smiling. As Tyra Banks would point out, I was smiling with my eyes.

Anyhow, I do enjoy how it appears that I am beginning to grow a mullet because of the shadow my ears are making against the white background.

I do have concern that I am starting to develop a permanently surprised look. I swear I haven't been touching the Botox.

Anyhow, this photograph was taken a couple of days ago for my replacement passport. The passport that was stolen from my locker at the Midtown Minneapolis YWCA a few months back. Yes, I'm still angry. I digress. I posted this picture because I was asked to post a recent picture.

Check Mate

I wish everyone would love Janet Jackson as much as I do. I know she lost a lot of points for pulling out her forty-year-old tittie at the Superbowl, but she is still a pop icon and the most successful African-American female in music history.

I think people take for granted how fabulous Ms. Jackson is. However, it's easy to be reminded when you place her next to someone who everyone thinks is fierce (e.g. Tyra Banks). Janet has that Tyrannosaurus Rex beat!

p.s. Don't forget that Janet is ten years older than Tyra.